Tuesday, December 19, 2006

The Latest 10 Things I'm Out On List

Clint McWilliams began the "Ten Things I'm Out On" list, but here is my latest.

1. Children on leashes. Your kid is not a pet, so don't treat them like one. And especially don't put your kid on a cute leash that is decorated with fake lion fur. Just because you aren't using a metal chain to keep your kid within yanking distance doesn't mean you are any better of a parent.

2. People who wander aimlessly through the mall during Christmas. Have a flight plan and stick to it. I don't want to be stuck behind you while you are pondering your next move.

3. Passive drivers. If you are going to get over then step on the gas and come over. Don't make me slow down to be the nice person and then you contemplate if you can make the gap or not. Just go for it.

4. Those who stare at their cell phone while they are walking in a crowd. I don't care if you think you are the greatest texter on the planet, you are in my way and I want to move. Either walk to where you are going and then converse with your friends electronically or get out of my way.

5. This one I am guilty of so I will have to do something about this. People who own more shirts or other type of clothing for a university they didn't attend than one they did.

6. Tabloids. If you can't report the news accurately then don't report it at all. You give fanboys of whatever rumor you happen to be talking about hope of something that isn't going to happen.

7. People who walk in the middle of the path in a parking lot. Get to the side and let cars go on through.

8. Nicknames for couples: TomKat, Brangelina, Bennifer. Stop it!

9. Poker players who pay to draw for overs and then don't bet if they hit what they were looking for. If you're going to draw out on somebody, have the decency to make some money out of it.

10. Cancer. It's the 21st century's version of the plague. We will reach a point someday when the question isn't, "Will you get cancer?" but, "Will you survive your cancer?"

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