This Just In

A man from Ennis has come up with the perfect clothing idea. I will be wearing this new addition to fashion to church this coming Sunday. It is an attachable pocket for your shirt. WOW! What an idea.
This guy probably came up with the answer to the age-old question, "What do you do when you go to a business party and you're wearing a shirt that doesn't have a pocket on it, while everyone else, including your boss who is thinking of filling Johnson's administrative position, has a shirt with pockets?" Add your own pocket. Genius.

Congratulations James, You Beat Out The Competition

Clint and James have both had their hopes set on being in the Ennis Daily News and after just a few weeks James won the race by doing something newsworthy...he came to the Polka Festival.
My job Saturday was to go to the three dance halls in Ennis and take photos of the people enjoying the music and food. I was also supposed to take pictures of dancers, but that was like finding a neo-nazi at a NAACP rally. Hard. For a bunch of PoLKofA (Polka Lover's Klub of America) members being in one room, they don't really do much polka dancing.
James decided to help me out by finding two girls dressed in Czech garb and he proceeded to ask them for a photo. He lied to them a bit by saying he was with the Daily News, but he and I believe in the motto "whatever it takes to get the job done."
James is sporting his new Polka Festival shirt and has a proud smile on his face. However, the smile is not because he is standing between two teenage Czech girls. It's because he came up with an idea that got him in the newspaper.
Sorry Clint, but James beat you on this one.

39th Annual Polka Festival Begins

Tell me who is more pathetic in the following situation:
Player A: Enters a polka dance contest.
Player B: Travels out of their way to watch a polka dance contest.
Player C: Journalist happily humming to music during polka dance contest.

I will tell you. It is Player C. I am the most pathetic. To start things off this year during the polka festival, Sokol Hall held the 19th Annual King and Queen Polka Dance Contest tonight. Let's give it up for Jack Rabbit Slim's Dance Contest. Anyone...anyone...no, okay.
Sandy, my editor, put Micah on high school graduation commencement while I was stuck with polkaus dorkius (that's Latin for polka dork). I thought I was getting the better gig. Little did I know.
The night started off bad. I didn't take my official Ennis Daily News press pass inside with me because Micah has now made me feel self-conscious about the thing. But of course, because I wasn't wearing it, a big stink was made with the officials. I went back outside and got the darn thing and wore it proudly all night long, especially when I met up with the reporter from our rival newspaper, the Ennis Journal, but we will get to that in a minute.
Next, as I was waiting for the contest to start, a little girl of about six or seven started talking to me. She showed me a quarter and asked if I could spin it. Because of the loud accordion coming from the 38 speakers next to me, I heard would I spend it. So I grabbed the coin and what happened next? Little Susie Q flips out. Okay, okay. Take your quarter back. Good gosh. She then shows me how to SPIN the quarter. Nice trick kid, but can you stop it with your thumbs and shoot it into the basket I have created with my thumbs. Oh, you can't. Then take a shot.
Just kidding people. She then played the lovable game of I will roll the quarter and you try to not let it pass you. This was fun for about half a roll. I thought about letting the darn thing pass me every time just to get amusement out of watching her crawl underneath tables and people to get a lousy 25 cents.
Finally the contest started. It was fine on the whole. Nothing of interest happened. I did hum with the music. I am lame.
Afterward, as I was taking pictures of the winners, I saw a girl in full 1874 Czech gear holding a notepad. Who was this? It was the competition. She was the Ennis Journal reporter, who came from L.A., and that's not the abbreviation for Louisiana. She came all the way from California to be a reporter in Ennis. What was she thinking. (By the way, Micah that is not a slam at you. I have heard the reason you are in Ennis, so much love.) My rival for information was actually kind of nice. I let her ask all the questions to the winners while I just wrote down answers. It was a nice gig. Unprofessional, maybe. Easier, definitely.
I finally thanked everyone who had given me info, congratulated the winners and booked it out of Sokol Hall. My introduction to the Polka festival has been not great, but maybe tomorrow will hold a better day.

Extra! Extra! Read All About It

That title is for you Clint.
For those who care, I may be on t.v. tomorrow morning. Channel 11 News (CBS) will possibly be airing a clip on the Polka Festival and I will be in a background shot doing the chicken dance. Check it out and let me know if it airs, because we all know I'm not getting up any earlier than I have to unless I know it is a sure thing. I'll be right behind the chicken in a white and blue plaid shirt.

Retirement Came A Bit Early

This will be short because there is more important stuff going on right now. After last night at WinStar, I am deciding to retire. Actually, I am going to take a little hiatus from poker. If the TOC starts then that might bring me out of retirement early, but I plan on it lasting about two months. Maybe I will come back when I am 25 (that would be August 9 for those who don't know when my birthday is). However, from what I have just found out I might not be invited to the next TOC. People don't like playing with me according to some sources. I hope my game improves during this time away. Until later.

Clint, This Blog Is For You

There are 22, count them 22, gas stations in Ennis. I was asked to find 17 of them and put their prices on Sandy's desk tonight. It took me about 20 minutes to find them all and write them down. However, there are over 20 gas stations in the little town of Ennis. Suck on that Clint.

I'm One Year Old Today

It's been a long journey and lots of crazy things have happened in that year, but I've made it. I have been blogging for one full year as of today. I have been on several road trips to Shreveport, Las Vegas and recently Oklahoma. I went on a mock trip through Europe. That was really fun. I have had my handprints reinstated at Duff Elementary. I have blogged about interviews and jobs.
Some changes have had to be made to my template due to pranks from friends and mistakes on my part. I have added links to my friends blogs. Clint, I now have you as a link, so don't stop posting.
I didn't add the counter until probably six months into the blog's life, but I have had quite a number of people to look at the thing. I hope to keep this going for another strong year and I will post as much as I can.
If anyone wants cake or refreshments, it will be on the kitchen table. That is located above the drain where the blood and fluids would drain during the embalming. Have a good day and see you next year.

Week Not Going Well For New Reporter

It only took 12 working days for me to finally show up late. Today I came rushing into work 15 minutes late. By my watch I was only five minutes late, and considering I woke up seven minutes earlier and looked quite presentable I would say I had done pretty well. Of course, it is the business clock that matters, so I was 15 minutes late. I will have to set my home clocks to my work clock.
Yesterday I discovered by creating folders on the server I had locked up the computers and screwed up some stories. Now I'm showing up late. My Battle of the Bands story sucked about as bad as Sidekick Jane's performance Friday night. This week is not going too well for me.

My Second Week As A Reporter

I am still a reporter. Not fired yet. Isn't that great? I have been learning a lot and am now a published reporter.
Thursday morning I came into the office and found a picture frame leaning against my computer screen. I walked around to see what it was and to my surprise I saw the front page of that morning's edition framed with some balloon strings attached to the upper corner. How thoughtful are my coworkers? Sandy told me congratulations on having my first cover story published. It was very sweet. The poster is now hanging in my bedroom. I love it.
The front page contained two stories I had written. One was about the Chitale case in Waxahachie and the other was a food drive conducted through the Ennis Post Office. Neither of the pictures used are mine, but the writing is (minus some editorial work from Sandy).
My interview with the newly elected mayor of Alma ran in Friday's edition. It also made the front page, however I have quickly figured out that almost anything written by Micah, Sandy or myself will make the front page unless it is a feature column.
Some pictures I took last week of a student/teacher basketball game and an elementary musical were supposed to run in tomorrow's edition, but the files were locked up, because of a mistake on my part. Instead, the sports story will be run without pictures now.
I should also have my Battle of the Bands fiasco run tomorrow. We will see.
I love my job still. It is exciting and new. I can't wait to learn some more lessons and write more articles about all things Ennis.

Good Night Ennis!

Last night I was assigned the gig of covering the Ennis High School freshman class fundraiser Battle of the Bands. The show itself had its laughs, but I will not take away from James' story. If you would like to know what happened and who should have won, go to his link on the right.
This site will be for what I learned at Battle of the Bands. First lesson, my press pass will get me anywhere I want to be. Forget American Express, I have Ennis Daily News. All I have to do is where the plastic card around my neck and throw out the words "Daily News" and I am allowed full access. I wanted a picture from the stage during a performance, I got it. I wanted an interview with the band, I got it. I wanted cops to break up a mosh pit, I got it. Actually the last one wasn't really what I wanted. It just happened that during the set of The Bronco League a group of misguided youth ran to the front of the auditorium and jumped around like fools. Local law enforcement quickly dispersed the fans. My press pass is the greatest thing ever. I'm going to take it everywhere now. Local restaurants, bars, concerts. I'll get anything I want.
Second lesson learned was I need assistants. I did some of my best journalizing last night because James helped ask the questions and Clint wrote down the answers. As a team, we accomplished what some of the best journalists in the world only attempt. I can easily put them on the pay roll if they don't want more than $5 an hour and a free tab at the local Three Dog Tavern.
My final lesson is something I already knew, but I am going to reiterate it for you. I don't really like high school kids. They are annoying, obnoxious and clueless know-it-alls. What made last night so terrible was 80% of the bands were high school kids who tried so hard to be different. Yet in trying to be different they ended up all being the same. You want to know how to be different in high school. Be a dork. That's the answer. Geeks and dweebs are outcasts in high school because they are different. Tip of the day students: If you want to be different, be a dork.
Last night was a lot of fun and three out of five bands were actually decent. The first two sucked though. The first were laughable bad and the second were bad in the "I want to bang my head against a wall instead of listen to this filth" way. If you would like to know more about the bands, check out James' blog. He will have his story behind the night, a critique of the bands and a Q&A with the winners.

My First Big Case Ended In A Plea Bargain

I have been with the Ennis Daily News for only eight days now, yet I have already attended my first criminal trial. Too bad the defendant, Dr. Ani Chitale (not a doctor any longer), pleaded guilty to two counts of sexual assault and two misdemeanors of sexual misconduct and public lewdness.
He was given 180 days in county jail, minus one credited day, the maximum fines of $10,000, $4,000, $2,000 and court costs, 10 years deferred adjudication community probation and had his medical license taken away. Chitale will also be listed as a sexual offender for the rest of his life, so Clint can look the guy up on the website he checks out for personal reasons.
I got the first big case out of the way. I should be golden for the rest of them. The story was written up by yours truly, but if Sandy doesn't use it I wouldn't blame her. I practically copied the entire press release and old stories for the new one. It had a quote from the victim, but other than that I wouldn't expect anything better than what a high school student could type up the night before his senior thesis is due over Animal Farm. For you seniors out there who were just reminded about that thesis, www.online-literature.com works well.

More Painful Lessons

What I learned from WinStar Casino is this. A hand like 2-3 is playable only when it is suited. People will sit for blackjack even when they have to pay for the seat. WinStar Casino allows players to drop the "f" bomb at the table.
Lesson one leads into lesson three. While playing $10-20 Hold'em, I had pocket Kings and was in late position. What this means is no one is going to fold that hasn't already called. I just called to see a flop. The flop was low card, low card, low card. I bet. A few called. The turn was a low card. I bet, got raised and called. The river was a low card. I checked. Guy bet. I called. He showed 2-3 suited. I notice a two and a three on the flop. Without a moments hesitation I spew the line, "Wow, that is a f___ing terrible hand."
This doesn't phase the young pup. I call him young because he had to be no older than 18 (WinStar allows 18 and older in their casino). He asks quite calmly and almost apologetically, "What'd you have?" I told him my pair and he answered back, "Oh, that sucks. That's a bad beat man. Usually I don't play that hand...but it was suited."
Ooooooooooh, it was suited. That explains it. Okay, a three high flush will probably be good. Excellent call.
I lost it. I got up, walked over to Chad and James and told them about the bastard who knocked down my pocket pair. Now ladies and gentlemen, I am calm most of the time at a public card table. Sometimes between friends I will threaten to punch someone in the face, but in a casino card room I usually just sit and take the pain of a bad beat. I have flipped someone off before and cussed quite loudly another time, but on the whole I am pretty good. Well, not Saturday night. I didn't care then. This kid pissed me off.
I went back to the table, sat down and decided to win my next good hand. I had $51 left. The hand before I was big blind was perfect for me. I was dealt A-K of clubs. So it is about as useful as A-K offsuit. Statistics show the clubs don't come as often as say spades (this is sarcasm if you're not picking up on it). I raised from under the gun. Got called by one player and the blinds. The flop came A-6-2. Small blind checked. Big blind the same. I bet 10 of my last $30. Guy to my left (we will call him "But They Were Suited") raised. Small blind called. Big blind folded. I re-raise. But They Were Suited called. Small blind called. The turn is a nothing card. Small blind checked. I bet my last dollar for the all in.
This is where it gets mind boggling. Keep in mind this pot is about $170. But They Were Suited thinks about it. I don't mean for a few seconds. He ponders what to do. He finally called. Woah, are you sure you're getting the proper odds for that call? Oh, he must be weighing in the implied odds so if he hits his hand he will get more money out of me. The small blind also thinks about it. What is going on here? This is not a complicated matter. IT'S A DOLLAR. Maybe they wanted a smaller increment bet. Can I convert that into yen? Small blind finally called. What a shock.
The river came with a six. I know this card hurt me. The small blind came out betting. Well, he has a six. I said this out loud. I said it loud enough for But They Were Suited to hear me. He called. Oh, do they both have a six? Who has the higher kicker?
The small blind flips over 10-6 suited. No surprise. But They Were Suited flips over Ace-Five suited. Surprise. Let's break this down. How can the small blind call a raise pre-flop with 10-6 suited and then play it once an ace hits the board and people are betting, raising and re-raising? Fine, whatever. How can But They Were Suited call on the end without a six and only a five kicker with his two pair?
Needless to say, I was out. Before we left I learned one more lesson. Blackjack has a small charge at WinStar. Hey Chihay, what's with the rental fee. James paid fifty cents for every hand played at blackjack. If you want a full lay out of the blackjack experience go to James' site. His link is on the right.
WinStar will be our new casino of choice despite it only opening the card room for 11 hours, being understaffed and lacking in customer service. The plus sides are it is more than half the drive Shreveport is, holds as many tables as the Horseshoe card room and is more than half the drive Shreveport is. Excuse me? Oh yes, the drive is that important to us.
No one came back profitable, but the inaugural trip of Oklahoma gambling was a worthwhile experience. We just wish Clint had joined in on the fun.

I Choose WinStar

I will make this brief since I am at work. James, Chad and I went to WinStar and it didn't pan out too well. I lost some money and hated the people at my table. I will go into more detail later tonight.

Name This Quote

I was watching a movie today and a speech I have heard before delivered by one of the characters made me laugh almost as much as the monologue from National Lampoons Christmas Vaction. Here is the quote:

You want me to teach you something? You want to learn something? All right. Here's a useful lesson for you. Give up. Just quit. Because in this life, you can't win. Yeah, you can try, but in the end you're just gonna lose. Big time. Because the WORLD is run by the man.
Who?
The man. Oh, you don't know the man. Oh, he's everywhere. In the White House. Down the hall. Miss Mullins, she's the man. And the man ruined the ozone, and he's burning down the Amazon, and he kidnapped Shamu and put her in a chlorine tank. Okay, and there used to be a way to stick it to the man. It was called rock and roll. But guess what. Oh no, the man ruined that too with a little thing called MTV!
So don't waste your time by trying to make anything cool or pure or awesome, because the man is just going to call you a fat, washed up loser and crush your soul. So do yourselves a favor and just GIVE UP!

My First Week As A Reporter

Today marks the end of my first week as a journalist for the Ennis Daily News. The week has gone quite fast, however that may be because I come in at 10 in the morning and leave at around 3:30 in the afternoon, but in my defense it is because I have gone to meetings in the evening.
Sandy, my editor, is teaching me a lot. Tuesday and Wednesday I wrote up a mock story for the meetings I had gone to the previous night. Sandy then had me compare the story to what was published in the morning paper by Micah. We have yet to go over those stories, but we plan to next week. Yesterday I went on a scavenger hunt for different locations and offices throughout Ellis County. I now can find the Sewer Treatment Plant in Ennis and the Waxahachie Civic Center. Good for me.
For today, I was assigned a research project. I had to find the answers and documentation for the following:
1. List of all registered sex offenders in Ennis zip codes.
2. How much money did the Texas Department of Transportation (Tx DoT) spend on projects in Ellis County in 2004?
3. List of Ellis County projects currently in progress by Tx Dot.
4. Find and prepare an open records request to the Ellis County Sheriff's office asking for the total number of drug-related arrests in 2004 and 2003.
5. How many veterans are there in Ellis County?
6. What is the total rainfall for Ellis County this year? What was the coldest, hottest, wettest day of this year so far?

I found an answer to all but the veterans question. I believe this office is closed for good because they have been closed the last two days during my scavenger hunt and they haven't returned my phone call yet. That was another cool thing about the research project was that I got to call around and ask people for official documentation to be faxed to Matt Cook, government reporter at the Ennis Daily News. How cool is that? The coolness will fade away according to Micah.
I had the biggest problem trying to locate the weather answers. It cannot be found on the national weather website. I eventually called KERA in DFW and asked them where I could find the answers. After the initial dumbfounding sound in their laughter at my question they eventually transferred me to enough people that I could get a reliable phone number to call. I had to get the info from the Waxahachie Fire Department.
The two biggest things about this week have been my paycheck (for two days baby) and my first published picture. I took a picture during a prayer meeting Wednesday night and it was published on the front page of the Thursday edition. My mom and friends are all so proud of me. If you would like a detailed description of Wednesday nights events, go to James' blog. His link is on the right. I really like my job and can't wait to learn more.

I'm Back, But Not Whole

I have to recreate everything, but I am back in business. My buddies decided to play a joke on me and it went a little to far. My e-mail and blogger accounts were hacked into. I have them back and am working on rebuilding.